Learn to forgive. If you want your friendship to last, then you should be able to forgive your friend and to move forward. If you hold a grudge and let your bitterness and resentment build up, then you won't be able to move forward. Recognize that nobody's perfect and that if your friend is sincerely sorry and that if he or she didn't do something too horrible, that you should move past it.
- If your friend really did do something so unforgivable that you just can't get past it, then it's better to move on than to try to save the friendship when it's doomed. But this should happen very rarely.
- If you're angry at your friend but haven't told him or her why, you'll never be able to forgive him if you don't talk about it.
Accept your friend for who he or she is. To make your friendship thrive, you shouldn't try to change your friend or make your friend see the world from your perspective. If you're conservative and your friend is liberal, then accept that instead of trying to argue about it all the time. You should appreciate the fresh perspective your friend can bring to your experiences instead of wanting your friend to see everything from your perspective.
The more you are with one another, the less you idealize each other and the more you accept one another for who you really are. This is what being a truly good friend is really about –- caring deeply for each other, even if you know you're both full of flaws.
Go beyond the call of duty. A friend will wait while you do your homework. A great friend stays up all night helping. Remember that if you are a good friend, people want to be a good friend to you. Recognize the moments when you need to go above and beyond to help your friend and know that this will make your friendship grow, and that your friend will do the same for you in return.
If your friend really needs you and keeps saying, "No, you don't have to do that..." learn to read between the lines and know that your friend really does need you.
Stay in touch no matter what. As the years pass, people tend to grow apart. Maybe you and a friend will move to different places and only see each other every once in awhile. Sometimes years may elapse without much contact. If you never stop caring about your friend, speak up. He or she will be happy to hear from you. You were friends for a reason in the past, and you may find the same bond still ties you together.
- Don't let your location determine the strength of your bond. If your friendship is meaningful, then it should keep growing even if you're an ocean apart.
- Make a goal of having monthly phone or Skype dates with your friend even if you're in a completely different time zone. If keeping up with your friend becomes a routine, your relationship will continue to thrive.
- Don't try to make your friendship be exactly the same as it was ten years ago. Think of it as elastic, not solid.
- If your friend is married with two kids or even just in a serious relationship and you're not, be respectful of the fact that, while your friend really cares for you, she won't be on call 24/7 like she used to be.
- Appreciate the changes your friendship has made over the years, and learn to grow along with your relationship.
